The other night I was at a party with Nicolas Bro. The great, lovely, luminous Nicolas Bro. He certainly was that evening, where with graceful improvisation he presented himself as odd backing dancer for rapper Pharfar. It was so special that it gave me the courage to be me. I actually felt that it was easier just to be human, because he dared to show that he is..
Dance or die, he said afterwards – this was his choice.. The fact that he chose a completely original dance was brilliant. Life-affirming. I was deeply moved by it.. Maybe because I know the feeling that the moment is NOW – people look, the attention is there, there is an opportunity for a message to get through… Also I know how it is to be a little scared to choose to dance – risking to give all I have- or wilting and withering, because I let the fear of other people’s judgment steer my way..
It looks so incredibly easy when a trained person like him does it – but it’s just not very easy to stand up for most of us .. Especially not when under pressure and at high speed we can feel judged and assessed, convicted in or out .. Maybe that’s why several of the major Danish companies see being tough as an important positive quality for a leader and frontrunner. For it’s clear that it’s resilience we need, when we constantly have to perform, deliver, sell, think wisely, be empathetic, innovate and be creative… Or is it?
What happens to the resilient person’s ability to dance? What happens to the originality? The energy? The ease and this open invincibility?
I am in a phase where I sparkle with enthusiasm and creativity, and I want to dance.. My drive is top notch.. I want to pass on some of what I have learned over the years, to explore, to inspire and to learn by interacting with others. But how do I avoid my ambition and drive taking over? How do I hold on to the openness and vulnerability? These qualities that help me find the easiest path and help me connect to what really matters to the people I work with. It’s as if my looong journey from being Super Sille, someone who was always trying to please others, to then becoming the Super-cool-business consultant with hard-core top executives and boring power points is now about to settle in something that is quite unreasonably simple; just us, somewhere between heaven and hell having contact with each other surrounded by nature. Going through a quiet and calm, healing development, while the shields slowly dissolve so that the light can come in and your sparkle can shine again..
It’s incredible what simplicity, nature and attention can do to our ability to simply just be human – and what it does to our invincibility, originality and courage to dance.. One of the participants from the last Wilderness Retreat said afterwards:
“My biggest realization was just how much of our self-image is the reflections that bounce back to us from other people – how they react to us, what they say, their body language to us .. It so defines who we think we are . Once that circle of mirrors is taken away, you quickly realize… Oh, so this is me then …. And that is a good thing. It is not necessarily hugely different to what you thought you were before, but it is totally from YOU rather than coming from anyone else. I felt that when on my big walk after the first hours and night of silence. Sitting on the top of the huge granite hill, looking over the lake, the sunshine finally flooding the sky; whittling my little Swedish horse. I thought, so this is me … And I am kind of ok with who that person is. And there are totally happy to just be alone with myself. I bounced back to the camp, jumping ravines and fallen trees. I felt invincible. That feeling is still with me – in fact I bought a sweatshirt with the word INVINCIBLE on it last week!.. ”
Is there something very simple you can do today, just to give yourself permission to be who you are?
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